You make some excellent points about the persistence of feminist misunderstandings of butch/femme (which is something that I think those of us who are immersed in queer culture can easily forget) and also about the way dominant media, etc fail to “get” butch/femme codes in celebridyke world.

FYI I wrote about Lohan and Ronson on my blog and I actually sent my latest post on lipstick lesbians, femme, etc to Feministing, at least in part because some people’s response to Portia and Ellen seems so unaware of lesbian gender and what it means for many queer women. We’ll see if Feministing posts it!

this is not to say that the femme conference was absent of drama. i’m sure that was the case for some and i’m in no way trying to romanticize it or say that what you’re describing as femme-on-femme hating did not go on. i didn’t hear any personally, but i’d have to be naive to think we’d all shelve our cattiness completely for 72 hours!

that all being said though, i hope they put the keynotes’ transcripts or videos online and i hope you read/watch them, especially the ones by leah lakshmi piepzna-samarasinha and dorothy allison. they both really addressed the need for us to start being good to one another as femmes and reminded us of how much we need one another to rely on.

I’m fascinated by what you have to say about the continuities between queer femininities and other forms of femininity. This certainly makes sense thinking about Julia Serano’s work. Still, it’s quite a departure from the usual discussions which center on the differences between femme and femininity. I’d love to hear what others have to say about this.

Thanks again for your post.