Del Martin and my femme conflictions about her life’s work….
August 28th, 2008 Sassafras <div class=\"postavatar\">
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I’ve been really sad ever since hearing the news yesterday that Del Martin died. The moment that she and Phyllis Lyon were married just a couple of months ago was so beautiful, and even though I have an incredibly complicated relationship to the institution of marriage I was incredibly touched by the fact that they were the first couple to be married. Yesterday I heard about her death before a lot of news outlets had picked it up and I just kept thinking about how sad it was, and what an inspiration their relationship is to so many of us in the community. When I got home from work and Kestryl told me that all the flags in San Francisco including a rainbow flag were flying at half mast in her honor I nearly lost it, it was such a beautiful image, and yet as a femme I feel incredibly conflicted.
As most folks know Del Martin and her partner Phyllis Lyon founded Daughters of Bilitis,the first national lesbian organization, and as part of that ran the organization’s monthly magazine The Ladder. This all relates to femmeness because the Daughters of Bilitis as an organization was primarily focused on the needs of middle class white lesbians, and encouraged its members to avoid standing out so as not to tarnish the cultural appearance of the rest of them. This means that the group actively encouraged folks to not cross-dress, to avoid appearing as too different, and to not embrace butch-femme cultures and identities. Read the rest of this entry »
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